and his associate Mr. Neverbeforethat
are proud to announce the discovery of the worlds most rare and minuscule species of dragon!
After years in the field surrounded by danger and unimagined horrors, our very own heroic explorers have returned with proof of a strange new species of previously undiscovered dragon!
Our scientists have hypothesized that these miniature sized dragons must live beneath the very soil itself,
for this is where our brave explorers have found their tiny remains. Imagine! Dragons! Just beneath our feet!
This most amazing of discoveries will go down in the record books of The Time That Never Was.
History as we know it could be changed forever.
The future may shift at any moment!
It is an amazing day and age that we are approaching my dear reader!
However Sirs and Madames, it is because of this magnificent new discovery that I must caution you to read these next words with the utmost care.
The Great Baron has realized that along with the notoriety and acclaim that this discovery has brought him,
he also has a responsibility to his fellow man to keep our people safe! The acknowledgment of this new species as a boon to science has also been accompanied by the reality that dragons, however tiny, are a dastardly threat to children and family pets!
Upon his late discovery, our Baron has sent notice to the capital in an effort to cease work being done on the Tunnel to the Center of the Earth. Picture if you will, the misery unleashed upon man should we by chance break into a hive of miniature dragons beneath the citys soil! All could be devoured!!
Ladies and Gentlemen I must implore your aid.
Now with this most amazing of discoveries, time is of the essence! We need your assistance in preparing against this new threat, should it emerge to roam our cities uninvited!
The Great Baron Von Notbeforethis has founded an amazing new organization with the sole purpose of safeguarding our people against this new threat should the day arise.
This organization - Man Against Threat of Itsybitsy Little Dragon Attack, code name M.A.T.I.L.D.A. is taking steps to protect our magnificent society, so that you dear reader, may sleep soundly in your bed at night, knowing that all is well and taken care of.
But what does The Great Baron ask of you in return dear reader?
After selflessly pouring his personal funds to the last dollar into MATILDA, our Baron has come up just short of being ready and able to protect the helpless masses from itsybitsy dragon attack!
A massive steel web has been constructed and buried beneath the very streets of our great city, holding dragons beneath the soil where they belong and keeping them at bay. But as funds ran out the web remains incomplete!
Tiny dragons may yet get through to feast upon the smaller and less fortunate of our citizens! A man of less solid disposition would have turned back at that point but not our Baron.
He has put out a humble request of you dear citizen, for a donation to aid MATILDA in protecting you and your loved ones from the impending threat of tiny dragon attack. But the Great Baron Von Notbeforethis would not have you donate your dollars for just one lifetime of miniature dragon protection.
Oh no dear reader!
For your $25 donation you will receive an official certificate from MATILDA detailing how you have done your part to protect your fellow man from miniature dragon attack AND one genuine bonafied dragon skull, with presentation plaque! Watch your social circle turn green with envy as you display one of these fine monsters on your bookshelf with strange leather-bound books, or tucked into the corner of your cabinet of curiosities! Astound colleagues! Or collect your closest and most secretive of associates and start your very own chapter of MATILDA, keeping our city safe and spreading the news of this itsybitsy little menace to our society!
Funds for saving the world and keeping man safe from tiny dragons may be sent by Electronic Paypal Telegram to
MATILDAs Chief Executive Officer of Funds Management at:
MagnificentF at gmail . com
In your Electronic Paypal Telegram please note your name or the name of your fellow explorer, scientist, or airship captain as you would like it to appear on your official MATILDA certificate, and the address you would like your prize sent to.
Shipping for your dragon skull and MATILDA certificate is included in your $25 donation if you are within the USA. If you are located farther please inquire first as to additional shipping cost.
*Note: Merchant ships will not deliver to The Mysterious and Forbidden Continent of Isntreally.
We appologize if you are one of the blood thirsty cannibals that live there.
*Please allow up to two weeks for delivery.
With many thanks and best wishes for surviving possibly imminent small dragon attack,
The Great Baron Von Notbeforethis